in laws

I was married for 5 years and never met my in laws. They sent a few gifts from Pakistan, and I once talked to my father in law on the phone, but that was it.

Then, after the divorce I managed to date more immigrants who also did not have family in Canada and never had to meet any parents.

I didn't miss it.

Now after five months with Steve I had to meet his mother and her boyfriend. Wow, what an undue stress that is!  It's like applying for a job - put your best foot forward so the mother likes you!

Really, all the parents should do is make sure their son/daughter is happy and are being treated well. Maybe not even that much - we are supposed to be adults and make our own choices. I don't know if i will ever like anyone my daughters bring home, I can openly admit that.

Lucky for me, I seem to have a niche for talking to seniors. Steve's mom was quite shy but her partner was not, so he and I did quite a lot of chatting about old people stuff.  I definitely won him over, I knew that in minutes.

And so the verdict came in tonight from Steve's mom. She likes me, and thinks I will be good to him and treat him well. That's all a mother ever wants I guess.  Someone to be good to her boy. I knew, as a mother myself, she was very observant of how I treated him and I wondered if that would be me in 30 years evaluating the partners my daughters have chosen.  It seems almost primal to me, almost instinctual.  It was a mini awakening for me, and I am grateful for the experience.